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Sunday, 1 September 2019

Impostor's Syndrome

Impostor's Syndrome
Sunday, 1 September 2019
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Okay so recently Sophie did an amazing post about Impostors Syndrome and it really got me thinking about myself. No one puts me down more than myself, I am never this and I am never that and I am never good enough for myself and it's all down to Impostors Syndrome

For those who don't know Imposter's Syndrome is when you feel don't deserve your accomplishments or every goal you've achieved is just a fluke and one day you'll be uncovered as a fraud and honestly, I have always felt this. No matter how well I do I always feel like it's going to all come crashing down. I can't even tell you how draining it is on mental health. It would cause me to sabotage opportunities myself and when I was successful in actually sabotaging these said opportunities  I would say it was all for the best because I didn't deserve this. I am not sure when it started affecting me but I always felt do I really deserve good things?

All my life  I had been told: "Emmanuela you're average"

All my life with the exception of my mum I was told I wasn't special or I was just good, nothing more and nothing less and it wasn't malicious in any way it was just something that was said

"Emmanuela is a good student 
"Emmanuela is good 
"You did Good"
"Your grades are average"
"Yeah she's fine"

Teachers, colleagues, friends would say these things distracted, almost dismissively as if there was nothing else to say about me. I was just there and there was nothing to note about me. So when you're given extraordinary opportunities you wonder, do you really deserve them? Extraordinary for the ordinary?  Will little old me really benefit from it? Even when I told people my big dreams aspiration, I was always immediately humbled, I was told, to settle down and what can you do. To be honest I don't thrive in hardship I do need encouragement and assurance. I wasn't getting that at all except for one source and the one source was constantly drowned out by the other sources.

Impostor's Syndrome came into full effect when I got to uni. I thought I didn't even deserve the place that it was all a mistake somewhere, but  I continued with uni and got back my grades. I found that maybe I was average but I was pretty darn good in my chosen field and it helped I was in an environment were people encouraged me.


I think Impostor'sSyndrome needs to be studied more closely as Sophie found in her own personal study that a lot of people had suffered from it, although experiences may have varied and intensity would differ.  I hope someday it won't be dismissed as some quirky phenomenon and will take seriously.

Anyway check out Sophie, just click her name aaaannnnnd that's it!

Bye for now

Emmy  xx



Sunday, 18 August 2019

N is for Nursing

N is for Nursing
Sunday, 18 August 2019
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So I have finally finished the first year of Nursing and it has been a rollercoaster. Did I say rollercoaster? I meant a carnival ride where the screws have been loosened so you've been chucked into the sunset hoping to perhaps die peacefully for you to be actually slung into the ocean where you eventually drift ashore and are rushed to the nearest hospital for the ambulance to turn a corner way too sharply causing your body to fall out and down a cliffside and-. You get the picture.   I actually didn't go into the course with any expectations I just wanted to be a nurse. That's it. I say that but I also wanted to professionally be able to stick a needle in someone.

What I did learn...Not to toot my own horn, but I learnt that I am incredibly patient. I have had someone throw up down my uniform, I have had someone curse at me, hit me, etc etc and I haven't been as fazed by anything as I thought I should have been. Particularly death, even before we were shipped off to placement we had a whole session about death and I was met with a wary look when I explained I didn't feel anything. It's not like I was apathetic of their death but rather I wouldn't react. I personally believe in keeping my cool because as a family is grieving I think they need someone who is able to listen to their concerns. I have always thought death was inevitable so I always thought it was pointless to dwell too much on it.


I have enjoyed learning on the placement and I have finally found where I thrive the best.  I love relating to people and there's a satisfaction in knowing your patient perfectly to the point you can chime in during handover to correct nurses when they may have had wrong information about a patient. I am in my element on the wards I like there's always an opportunity to learn and everything seems so fascinating. I truly do learn something every day and I can't lie no matter how crappy the day the has been I can always say well at least I improved someone's life.

I've cried on my placement \particularly when a  patient had a go at me despite me doing my very best to support them and I don't why I took it so personally. Maybe it was because I knew from the bottom of my heart that I was being sincere and to be told otherwise sort of stung. 

Looking back now I wish I was braver in taking up more learning opportunities by the horns. I was really timid and took a long time to open up.  I think the fragility of mortality hit me the most on placements. One of my favourite patients in my first placements passed away, she always had kind words for me and told me with the utmost sincerity that she believed  I would be a wonderful nurse and it really gave me some sort of hope. I really miss her she was so warm and kind and even as she was very ill she had a wicked sense of humour. I don't know if I will continue to be a nurse when I finish but I want to work in health care. I loved  helping everyone and working closely with  them and working out what was best for them,

Although I wish I had time to get to understand the roles of the doctors and the physiotherapists. Although some of the doctors clearly looked down on us. Two doctors even laughed in my face when
I had asked a simple question. A valid question at that and I don't at all appreciate it. I may be the first year but I am not daft. Some nurses and sisters clearly didn't want to work with me because I was the first year,  in their eyes we were burdens and they used very opportunities to pass us off and I hated it. Fortunately, my mentors were kind and answered all my questions

All in all, it was a tiring but fun experience and I am excited for next year


By for now 

Emmy xx





Sunday, 21 July 2019

Let's Talk editing

Let's Talk editing
Sunday, 21 July 2019
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Okay, I don't have a fancy camera, nor do I live in a fancy location so I have had to become creative if I wished to stand out a little from everyone else. So here is my long-awaited post about how to edit and what apps I use



1. The iPhone editing app



Yes, you heard me, for most of my pictures I tend to edit first with the iPhone inbuilt editing tool because it's pretty nifty, they have pretty good filters and other adjustment settings. In my opinion, they are just as good as the mobile Adobe Photoshop express.  Especially for my plain pictures where you don't see any overt editing. It's also quick and simple and I can edit as soon as I have taken the photo

Before




                                       
After






My favourite filter that the iPhone provides is the Dramatic filter because I like the contrast between colours 


2. HUJI app

The app is such lifesaver it can make any crappy picture look good and I use it in conjunction with my camera app. So when I take a picture of something with an iPhone camera I also open HUJI and take a picture of the same thing. It literally is my favourite thing at the moment. Who doesn't love a classic HUJI edit?


Image result for Huji app









3. Retro Cam

                                                                                     Image result for Retro cam app

Of course, there are times when you forget to use Huji cam and you think in hindsight the picture would benefit from the 1998 glow, fortunately, there is an app for adding that HUJI magic to your pictures. There are so many light effects and dust effects that you can easily add on to your photos
After

Before



3. Phonto

                                                                                     Image result for phonto

I use this app to add text to my pictures, you really have to play around with it and see what's right for you, there are no formulas that you can follow. It's really just how you express yourself 








4. Glitche



                                                                     Image result for glitche app  icon

I use it to add the- well, the glitch effect in my photos although I don't use it a lot on my feed, it's still something I enjoy using. I am currently playing around with it at the moment and seeing how I can incorporate it into my feed.




5. PicsArt 

                                                                    Image result for picsart icon


So I re-discovered PicsArt,  particularly the sticker features, you can really make your pictures your own and have fun and let loose. I can't tell you what and what not to do but I do really enjoy playing around with it. My advice? Express yourself, my style can be very different to yours 








Another honourable mention is Unfold, which I love using both for my stories and my feed! I am sure everyone knows about the app though




                                                                       Image result for unfold icon









I would like to mention that all these pictures were taken with an iPhone 7 Plus either with portrait mode or normal,  when using both I like to turn on the HDR, I don't know how or why but it improves the quality of pictures for me.
My last message is to just have fun! Don't take it all too serious, play around with your apps. there are so many things out there! 

That's all for now


Emmy xx

Saturday, 25 May 2019

Your Hair, My Hair

Your Hair, My Hair
Saturday, 25 May 2019
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So my hair has been natural for 4 years and the story about how I became natural is so bizarre.  I  was actually going to relax my hair and found that my relaxer had been leaking probably for months into my wardrobe. I remember shitting myself,  thinking my mum would finish me if she found out that I wasted her precious relaxer. So when I took my braids out I suggested that maybe I shouldn't jump to straightening it with a relaxer and instead leave it as it was, surprising her in the process. I carried this spiel on for several months to try and buy time and that was the beginning of the end. Looking back now I wasn't sure why I didn't just tell her the relaxer had leaked, maybe it was a sign. 

Looking at the pictures after, I came to hate the way my relaxed hair looked. It looked weak and dead, it burned and smelt and I was terrified of getting it in my eyes, because even until the big age of 16 I thought it would blind me if it ever got into my eyes. After all, that is what it said on the box. I will be honest with you I had no idea what to do with this new transition hair. Unlike most people who had to have their relaxed ends cut off,  mine fell out on their own, which, again, I deffo think was a sign. I really enjoyed the new volume but my goodness I couldn't style it even if my life depended on it, I used to just scrape it into a puff and didn't even KNOW what a bobby pin was.

It took a lot of confidence to wear my natural hair, there are always  going to be snide comments or backhanded compliments, my old manager told me to tidy my hair under the cap because he saw my hair as messy and two weeks ago a white man walked passed me and told his black wife my hair looked like a mess. My hair was in space buns. The bottom line is that natural hair on black women have been perceived as unprofessional for years, to the point black mothers to this day will encourage their daughters to straighten and relax their hair. The only reason the products even exist was that we had tried to "tame" our hair to fit a certain standard

There is nothing to tame, personally, I love my hair the way it is. It took a lot of growth and patients to be comfortable with who I am. If you told 13 year old me I would walk around with no makeup and my natural hair at 19, she would have cried, disappointed in future me for not trying to be pretty. I like it when my natural hair is out because it takes no more than 5 minutes to do AND it is versatile and fun to play with and soft to touch when I am sad. I think we need to move away from such an ignorant perception that anything a black woman does to her hair will be ratchet and unprofessional. It is OUR choice what we choose to do with the things that grows out of OUR scalp and let us love and embrace ourselves, whether we decide to braid our hair, or even straighten our hair. Black women have always been oppressed because of those choices, but I will no longer allow it. My hair is my hair and your hair is your hair.

White men and women I urge you to simply mind your own business when it comes to our hair, think about what you are saying when you talk to a black woman about their hair. At this point, we are tired of answering all your questions, not only because you can now utilise google.com, but also because the questions are used to make us feel small or embarrassed. No, I will not allow it anymore.

When I was young insults like That isn't even your real hair and I bet you're bald underneath all that, were common. I do not want my child to hear that when she grows up. It's just interesting when Ariana Grande openly admitted to buying her hair in 7 rings no one wanted to comment, instead it was everyone's insta caption for a week but that is another pitcher of water.

I am glad, however, that natural hair has become more common with sales of straightening agents going down. I am also so proud of the black women's nonchalant transparency when it comes to our styling hair. I am glad we stopped caring.

Like I said this is MY hair and I make the decisions around here when it comes to MY hair. All opinions should be kept to themselves.

PS You're still not allowed to touch our, hair it's weird.
PSS I can understand no makeup me can be horrifying erm sorry but like I don't have enough money for surgery someone PayPal me funds.

Emmy xx



Monday, 13 May 2019

Alone

Alone
Monday, 13 May 2019
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Before I went on my trip people had asked how I could go by myself and when I came back the question was still very much remained. So I decided to talk about being alone. Before I start I am being very open and vulnerable, so please be kind and try to be understanding about what I am trying to say, don't take this wrong way. Thank you.

When I was younger I didn't have many friends, I was also the kid that had to wander around and ask people if I could play. Usually, the answer was no. I was heavily bullied in primary school for being born in Germany I was often called Hitler or a German bomber and honestly, it didn't help that I and one of the most infamous men in history shared exactly the same birthday.  It was the worst start to my new life in the UK. There was already stuff going on in the background but I also had this at school as well. My teachers were less than helpful telling me to ignore the racist comments whilst I spent most of my early primary school days in tears. Some of my teachers were also incredibly racist as well.  When kids would say they were starving one particular teacher would say that only people in Africa were starving which is such a toxic image to portray to impressionable young kids. The bullying went on and teachers had neglected me. So to get rid of bullies I was terrible, I was violent,  I was aggressive and I was difficult to handle. I wasn't getting any friends, but at least I was left alone.


I hated primary school and honestly, not being dramatic I cannot stomach seeing anyone from that place again, only a tiny amount of people were kind to me, the rest were absolute devils. The experience still stays with me. I have tried and tried to move on, but it stayed like an ugly scar and there nothing I could do to get rid of it. On top of that horrendous ordeal at school, there was other background noise that was very much disturbed me. Like mentioned in my blog post: Growing up, the school was the only place I was allowed to act like a child and even then it was completely ruined. It didn't help that company I kept continuously ate at my esteem constantly belittling me. The company was kept on and off throughout high school. In the early years I didn't establish good friendships, hopping about from different groups of people and in the near the end I picked up one or two great gems although the friendship group was iffy, to say the least.

So all that time alone was my only safe option. I protected myself from the outside world. I tried to stop having feelings. It's funny to think, that to think and feel go hand in hand. For me, I thought more so not to feel.  I would rationalise my feelings so much that essence would be lost. The feeling would become a vague thought at the back of mind. It was almost like forcing the food down the sinkhole instead of consolidating the food and throwing the food in the bin. Eventually, the sink would block regurgitating something even more rancid and vile. Those were often aggressive outbursts or other things. In high school I went through that constant cycle, unsure where to turn to ask for help. there was no way I was turning to teachers again and because of a lack of trust, I wasn't turning to any of my friends. Being alone with your thoughts can be so dangerous. Some people are ticking time bomb and let me tell you to ask anyone from my high school what happened to me in year 9, you'll be shocked. Obviously, I will not talk about it in detail.

So being Alone was something I became accustomed to. I still find it hard to trust people. I lost friends because they would get to close and I would have to distance them again out of habit. I could rely on myself and I was very good at daydreaming and escaping through my thoughts, living out my very vivid imagination. There was a time I was never at home, there would be no one behind the eyes. As years went by, being alone becoming less toxic and more of a personality trait. I am really introverted, invitations have to be given to me weeks in advance so I can charge. Every time I go out I have to at least prep myself a little. I am much happier now but prefer to be alone now anyway. I am finally trying to understand who I am so I need my own space to do that in, without the influence of the outside world, because even though I was alone a lot before I was feeding off the insecurities of other people and all negativity surrounding me.

I am sorry it was all a little heavy this week, I'll return to goofy me next time. Also because I was alone a lot doesn't mean you have to be. If you ever feel like it's all a little bit too much please message me I am happy to listen, the same way so many people in my life have.

Note: Being alone and being isolated are two different things



Emmy
xx


Sunday, 5 May 2019

C'est La Vie-An open Letter

C'est La Vie-An open Letter
Sunday, 5 May 2019
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Dear Nobody and Somebody,






































I am writing this letter from the comfort of my sofa after arriving back safely. It was never my outright intention to be in Paris and I had mentioned the city in wistful abandonment to my mother never thinking I would go. Paris was not somewhere I had ached to visit but at least it had my curiosity, and so one day whilst lazily discussing future plans in the cafeteria with my colleague I was intrigued by her trip and decided it would be my coming of age trip. I decided it would be a nice place to celebrate my 19th Birthday.

I went alone.




































I needed my own headspace, there was clutter up in my head, my brain was like an attic with memories and thoughts gathering dust, inspiration had dulled and died, no one was going up regularly to clean it out and get the gears grinding. The clutter accumulated because I thought for anyone and everyone, but I hardly thought for myself. I never really knew how to be selfish and I never really knew exactly who I was. What did I feel and think like with the clutter of the world around me heavily influencing me? That why I was adamant on booking the trip by myself. I didn't want to hesitate anymore I wanted to be inspired and free. 


Paris is a romantic city although I did not find pleasure in the massive grandeur of Paris but rather the subtle things that are woven into the Parisian lifestyle. Paris was a city of leisure, unlike the purposeful rush and productive hum of London, the people of Paris were never in quite the same hurry, taking things at a pace, steady like a heartbeat. There was something delightful about an elderly lady descending into the metro with posies peaking out her handbag, or how at 9 am on the dot every day a rich homely smell of coffee drifted into my hotel room warning me if I didn't wake up soon I would miss breakfast. 

Parisians live to experience life, lounging parks with pastries in hand most would mumble under their breaths to a friend or partner over a steaming coffee at a cafe, sometimes they would glance at those walking by and continue where they left off. I remembered quite vividly during my trip sitting opposite to elderly gentlemen, one was wearing a white dress jacket and a checkered shirt and the other wearing a straw hat and a beige shirt and a loosened tie, they were in passionate conversation and I assumed they were talking about the state of the politics, it made me feel like I was an extra in a movie.

The cobbled streets seemed to trip me up when I moved too fast as if trying to humble me as if telling me I was in Paris now and I had to learn to slow down. I enjoyed standing on the platforms as the train hissed to a stop, inviting a flush of warm air. The streets were always cluttered with chairs from this or that cafe. There was always the tinkle of bicycle bells as someone zoomed past in the lime green city bikes. Lights would flicker from red to green, although the rules of traffic were mostly ignored by motorists or they seemed to follow their own rules, finding their own harmonies.



I remember sitting at the Banks of Seine by legs dangling over the edge watching The Eifle tower light up reminding  me of the story of the  tower, the people of Paris had taught it particularly ugly and an eyesore of the city, looming ominously over them, but now as I watched it sparkle and gleam against the dark blanket of the night sky. I realised that the Eifle is all of us, we just grow and realise our own Cinderella story.

Well, I hope you're well, you should visit sometime it's beautiful. I now know why writers  chose the city as their muse because it has sparked inspiration in me and I hope it does for you

Emmy xx



Sunday, 17 March 2019

Flare Ups

Flare Ups
Sunday, 17 March 2019
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Before we begin I would describe this look as more of a festival look, so when you lot all go to wireless and the other one(?) you can wear this look. (wow I  really am boring! I don't know I am not really a festival gal). Or, alternatively it can be worn on an island off the coast of Greece where the whole island follows a girl that is like 19, who is literally getting married in a week, has three Dads and is reading out her mum's diary, but also everyone is reminiscing of times where everyone wore sparkly flares and platforms. Hmm that sounds oddly familiar.

So let me start off by saying when I said "Look" I meant looks because I am pairing these NASTY GAL trousers with three separate tops (Why do I  often write like I am doing an introducing my YouTube videos I don't know,  judge me in your spare time)

Also also okay I couldn't find the blue version of these trousers but I found a grey version of them so click here to see them, they are also brown pairs which are pretty cute.


So here is the first top  I call it Snow White and the Seven Snakes (as you can see I am great at naming things and should be paid hourly to name your kids)

 So this is top has made an appearance once before in my post-Bad &Boujee on a Budget, This top is very versatile you can do a lot with it. Like I said in that post, on the hanger it would have looked great on Margaret aged 80, but do a few things here and there and it looks less like hello the 1600s and more like Hello wireless, Sometimes when I look at the top I get the: I went-to Thailand-to-figure-myself-out-and-now-I- am-going-to-be-less-terrible-for-like-a-week vibes, just radiating off it. I guess that's just me, maybe I am unconsciously telling myself something (oof). Also since the top kinda vaguely resembles table cloth as a friend so kindly put it, it is probably no surprise I found at a Charity shop(Keech Cottage)  for a pound. So guys utilise your nearby charity shops. It is usually for a good cause and thrift shopping is now "cool" so you may as well.























As you can see in the lower picture it can also be worn with Clout Goggles so that's nice. Where is my clout you ask? Well I don't have any, but a girl can dream. Most importantly they help you check the queue for the ice cream line without anyone seeing, so it doesn't look oddly suspicious when you suddenly get up and make a beeline for the cart(okay that was very specific, make of that what you wish). Anyway back on track. You can literally find them in Primark for 2 quid. So you can save monies and look fly



Okay so the next fit is called  I am cold Blooded and need the sun baby

Again not great at naming things, but this is a fun sunny look. This is actually a very beachy look or a look for a fun summer day in the park eating ice lollies, or sipping on pink lemonade, pulling your sunglasses down ever so slightly so you can peer over them. Or maybe wear this fit when you're on a road trip, whilst in the car, you're sticking your head out the mini camper feeling the breeze in your hair. This look makes me feel a lot









Look at my happy tum. I was a little bloated not going to lie. I would say sorry but that's just what happens to people sometimes. As you can see I am wearing a lovely yellow top, which I bought on my Maccies day trip with the rest of the staff so I wouldn't get wet. It was like £5 from Primark and super comfortable actually. I am sorry there isn't much to say I just love this








Okay dokie here is the last look Green with Envy

This look can be dressed up with a clutch purse and a pair of gold sandal heels or dressed down with a pair of nice wine coloured lofars or platforms, for a walk down Camden, whatever suits you. I just love the top and I feel overall wicked in this. Why? Well I am glad you asked I just love silk tops

I just love it! It looks so expensive and retro, this top can look very...yucky when just sitting there..! I was really gambling when I paid 50p for it at another charity shop and then thought I had lost when I discarded it in my wardrobe for two years, but tie it up into a crop top and all of sudden you're applying lipgloss and paring it with your famous red leather beret ready to fight somebody. Everyone knows how nice tied up silk shirts look.


Well here are my looks. This post felt quite new, I haven't really sat down and done a fashion post in a while. They almost always happen spontaneously but here you are, the best things in life are spontaneous. Thaats a wrap. Thank so much for reading and tell me what you think!

Adios 

Emmy xx
Sunday, 10 March 2019

Slicked and Snatched?

Slicked and Snatched?
Sunday, 10 March 2019
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I really like pleated skirts



I am black.

There is really no changing that, I am black no matter what I do. Being black is part of me. I listen to Trap music, but also would kill to see Twenty One Pilots. I love Beyonce, but I also love BTS. I like slicked edges, but I also rather not do it all the time. I like Afrobeats but can't dance.  There is an interesting perception of what it means to be a black girl in 2019. I am going to be the first to admit that time has moved on since the civil rights movement, but there is something that still hangs over me like a plague. I am black, but I am not black in the correct way. What does that mean? When you log on to Instagram or Twitter and look at the big black influencers  I notice I don't fit in. That's not my fault and it most certainly is not their fault, but media has managed to pedal out an image that every black girl seems to have in the back of their mind. The image of the Insta baddie sometimes referred to as "bad bitches"
I of course hardly fit that image, but that can be hard to come to terms with particularly when media insists that's what successful black girls are and that's how we are all meant to be.

This was my first fashion post at 16
I like things such as anime and Kpop and  I also enjoy rock music. When I was in high school and sixth from everyone would say I dress very much like well Emmanuela, my style was very unique to me. Someone once compared me to the girl in the movie Me Before You, which till this day is very confusing because I can't decide if it's a compliment or an insult (I took it as an insult). I noticed that wasn't what was expected of me as a black girl when people from my community started making comments about the way I dressed. Sometimes I was called a clown and was very used to black girls sniggering as I walked past which caused me to become embarrassed. I tried to tone down everything about myself down and instead tried to become the hardcore Azonto warrior type girl who was sexy and cool and everything those insta baddies were. Of course, I may have lost you there at sexy because I am a lot of things but I sure as hell ain't sexy. I didn't even like being that girl, it felt even less comfortable. I felt frustrated that some black girls and boys were willing to look down on me because I didn't fit in with the "archetype". I wondered what exactly girls like me were called. I was often told I acted "white" or I was trying to be someone I was not when in fact the person I was supposed to be wasn't me. I wasn't slicked and snatched and that should have been okay. I eventually found the term for girls like me on Twitter. It was "The Alternative Black girls"

I hated it.

What was that supposed to mean? I thought it made us sound like the other. Like there was a line between us and them.  I was already going through an identity crisis, so this made it worse. I wasn't even extreme enough to even be considered an "Alternative black girl" and that was simply because there were aspects of me that coincided with the Slicked and Snatched black girl so who was I? I had no idea
This look was for one of my other blogposts
Bad and Boujee on a budget

 This had implications for me as a blogger and as someone who was and still is trying to fight for my corner of the internet. A lot of black influencers are bad and boujee and it seems companies, brands and opportunities pass up black girls who don't fit the formula. It seems we aren't valid as black girls when we don't confine ourselves to one image which is very 2-dimensional considering race should certainly not define us. Let's be honest based on my style and demeanour PrettyLittleThing isn't sponsoring me anytime soon, so I am fighting to be noticed as a girl with interests in fashion rather another insta baddie and that can be so difficult for black girls when the formula is already laid out for us.  Black girls are people who are multifaceted, we are all different and we should be allowed to express ourselves, without discrimination or fitting criteria. The media should allow all types of black girls to flourish whether they are
This was my favourite picture of myself for along time. I was very proud of this picture
snatched or not. Is there are anything wrong bad boujee black girls? No way! It's just it's not realistic for everyone

So I am going to use my little page to say it's okay if you are black and can not stand Trap but enjoy House and EDM, it's okay to be black and  hate body cons, it's okay to be black and not constantly slick your edges and it's okay to be black and not be thicc with two Cs. It's okay to be yourself. Black girl magic is inclusive.

This post was very personal to me because I didn't really know where I belonged as a child and my teen years. I experimented with many styles whilst feeling pressured to just conform to one group. I won't say I am that unique so can you imagine what others face, but like I said I don't have one aesthetic I sort of float in and out
























another picture I loved for the longest time




As you can see I went through many looks many stages and looking back now I loved all of them. So be as unique as you're comfortable and enjoy everything you do.

Bye for now

Emmy xx
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